To Look or Not to look

I’ve always thought that it was bad luck to see your soon-to-be-husband or wife on the day of the wedding. That’s what I grew up hearing, and today I still believe that because I am a very superstitious person. Most people today don’t know why it is bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the ceremony. This superstition comes from the time of arranged marriages. The bride’s parents worried that if the groom saw her before the ceremony that he might not like how she looked and call off the wedding, casting shame onto the bride and her family. This is not a very romantic tradition. However, it’s still a tradition and superstitious people like me refuse to break tradition.

married-186I recently started working at a wedding venue and I’ve found that a lot of people would disagree with me.  A popular trend is a “First Look.” This is when the bride and groom share a moment together before the ceremony, usually just the two of them with the photographer. The photographer can get some great pictures of the emotions on their faces when they see each other for the first time on their wedding day. I’ve seen several pictures from “First Looks” and I think they are a really neat idea. I think it is possible to capture a unique, genuine moment with the “First Look.” Some of the pictures I’ve seen of “First Looks” leave me speechless. It is a very powerful moment, and to have had it captured to reflect on for the rest of your life is simply amazing. On the other hand, a lot of people hate the idea of a first look. Some say it’s too staged and you are capturing a fake moment since the bride and groom may try to act surprised or feel worried that their reaction won’t be good enough. In my opinion, one positive to the “First Look” is that you can get all of your pictures done before the ceremony.  This allows you to join your guests immediately at the reception and not keep them waiting.   It may also prevent your pictures from being rushed, allowing the happy couple to relax and enjoy the photo shoot. This may also permit them to actually get to eat at their own reception.

Then there’s the traditional way of not seeing each other until the bride is walking down the aisle. This can be very special because it is in the presence of all the people that you care about, witnessing the first look between you and the love of your life. When eyes lock and huge smiles spreads across the faces of the bride and groom, all that’s left to do is walk to each other and begin their lifelong journey. This is one of the moments I always look the most forward to when I go to a wedding. I think that sharing this intimate moment with all of your family and friends is special. All the people that mean something to you, helped shape your life, and help you who you are today get to witness the first look the two lovers share.

You could also do what I call “A Mock First Look.” This is where the two of you share a moment together but you do it without seeing each other. Maybe you stand with a door between the two of you or maybe around a corner. You talk to each other, maybe say a prayer, or just share a moment of silence. However, you do not see each other. Sometimes couples will get pictures taken while they are sharing this moment and I’ve always thought pictures of these moments turn out really cute. I really like the thought of “A Mock First Look” because I feel like it would give the couple a moment of privacy to gather their thoughts and share a private moment.Alexa & Chet

What it all comes down to is what you as a couple wants on your big day. Each option has its own benefits. I’ve always been dead set on not seeing my groom until I’m walking down the aisle, but after writing this, I’m definitely wondering if I’ll still want that when the time comes for my wedding.